The Dilemma
I watch more Wedding Movies/Romantic comedy’s than most guys (probably) and in each of them the just married Groom  give the Bride a romantic kiss and then, walking her down the aisle, whisks her off in to the sunset (or to the reception).  Never do I see them being herded back around to a hidden area waiting on the church guests to leave so they can go back in and have their group portraits created.  So how are you supposed to create this type of storybook exit and still take advantage of the family gathering for the once in a great while Family Portrait?

In this post, I’ll explore this common dilemma – Family Portraits Before or After the ceremony?

The Tradition
The main and strongly felt objection to the idea of having your Family portraits created before the ceremony is the resistance to letting the groom see you before the ceremony.  For some, to let him see you in your dress, for others to see you at all on the day of the wedding would be unthinkable.  Most brides want for the first time they are seen by the groom to be as the church doors opens and the Bride is revealed standing with her escort.

Being a former groom myself I can say this moment of revelation brought to me a feeling of … (are you ready for this?) relief!  No I didn’t think she was going to run off.  I knew she’d be there.  The thing is, (do I sound like Hugh Grant in Knotting Hill?), the thing is, I had just walked into the front of this room and had a hundred sets of eyes were looking at me and I didn’t know what to do about it.  Nothing I guess.  I was just supposed to stand there trying not to look nervous until something else happened.  The moments before the next event seemed like an eternity.  Thank goodness something else did happen.  People started walking up the aisle towards me.  But it was not until my bride was revealed did I feel that I was not being stared at (because everyone was looking at her instead)!  All that to say that this moment from the grooms point of view, was not what was advertised by the movies that I have seen.

The Alternative
How about this instead.   On the Wedding Day both the Bride and Groom each prepare themselves in their chosen attire assisted by their close Family and Friends.  Once each feels prepared, the groom goes to visit the Bride who awaits in a room or special outdoor location solitarily in expectation of her betrothed!  Music is playing in the background and she looks radiant as her lover enters and they share a moment together undistracted.

After the couple have had a time of sharing, they emerge and meet the rest of the Family at the altar or other location for the obligatory Family portrait Session.  Upon completion of the ceremony, the couple is free to enjoy a recieving line or leave for some quiet time as man and wife or head straight to the reception.

The Rest …
… of the story.  (Now I’m sounding like Paul Harvey)  I left out the part about where the tradition of the groom not seeing the Bride started.

As you are all aware, in years past many marriages were arranged (in fact many still are).  At times the couple had never even met each other.  In fact, so that the groom would not run off, he was not allowed to see the bride at all before the wedding day.  In the case he found he didn’t like the bride that was chosen for him, it would be too late for him at the altar!  That may also be where the tradition of the Brides veil comes in.

While I have mentioned the ideas I personaly find intriguing there are many other considerations.  I found an article by a Wedding Photographer in Spokane who does a good job discussing them.  Check out his article Wedding Portraits: Before the Ceremony, or After?